There comes a time in a girl’s life where a relationship will no longer be satisfactory and there are no options left than to call it quits. It might not be that your partner is doing you wrong in anyway but that you have lost the spark in him or in the relationship. When we find ourselves in that stinky situation we ran to our girlfriends and hope they shine some light in our obviously dark tunnel. We want to say “it’s not you it’s me” but it has been used so many it lost its sincerity.
It can never be easy to tell someone you want to move on without them especially if they don’t share the sentiments. A lot of ladies have found themselves in similar situations and they will tell you it’s not a walk in a park. This needs for you to put on your big girl panties and face the position you have found yourself in, after all its best if it’s all out your way; spare yourself the headache and nightmares and open up.
How do you make sure that no one gets hurts?
If you are busy searching for options to break up with him without any one of you getting hurt then girl you better wake up from the dream you are in. Breakups are painful, the only thing we can ever try to do is making it less nasty and heartless. Of course it’s going to be hard but you need to ensure that:
This is really what you want
Sometimes we think him eyeing another girl is a deal breaker but your heart will tell you if it’s not. Don’t compare your relationship to your friend’s, no matter how cute and fun it may be. Communicate your concerns with him first and see if he or both of you can try finding solutions to your problem; giving this a reasonable period. And if, even after the communication nothing happens, it’s time to face the big elephant in the room.
You plan the breakup
You have to be the director of the show and plan the setting; this is where and when it will happen and how you will initiate the conversation. You are most likely to know your partner and the kind of person they are so your planning should be according to their personality type. Anticipate the questions they will have for you and their reaction so nothing will be a shocker.
Everyone is calm
Your partner or should we say soon to be ex might act irrational and it will require that you become the bigger person and always speak in a calm tone. Don’t say things like “you are not…” rather focus on yourself and your wording should be like “I am not…” Don’t allow the breakup to escalate to a fight; you want this to be as civil as possible. Never do it via SMS, social media or close family or friends so you can allow him to get the understanding of the breakup; he deserves some time with you.
What do you do after the breakup?
Keep your distance
There shouldn’t be any loop holes, don’t make him feel like he can still wiggle himself back to your life. Allow both of you to heal and move on; no matter how much you feel for him, don’t answer his calls, text him back or reply to his social media posts.
Remind yourself you are not the first
You might feel like a devil and beat yourself up for hurting him but if you know that this is not something foreign, and what is worse than being in a relationship with someone you no longer love? You are doing him a good deed.
Get out more
Hang around with your friends and let everything out; talking is the number one remedy. You will feel a bit heartbroken even if you were the one who terminated the relationship; allow yourself to go through all the emotions. When all is over and done with, grab your purse and put on that lipstick and have some fun.