Would you carry on with the wedding if your fiancé tells you he has cheated?

The cat is out of the bag – he cheated … why? Slap bang the harsh news came so sudden just weeks before your wedding.

He had the guts to share his deep dark secret with you that demolished and demoralised your entire existence!


Now with this exposure of this bulletin you get an ultimatum to proceed with the wedding or become a run-away bride? We were going through utter bliss, plans were made for the wedding, venue set – caterers booked and paid for and band sorted!

Should you forgive and let bygones be bygones – will you ever eliminate the thoughts and visions that cloud your vision and move on. In a trance like state of illusion trying to fix things as they were prior to this moment. Or will this dark cloud hang over you for the rest of the marriage – until it finally erupts.

Can you, will you forgive? Do you go into a blinded frenzy of feelings of utter resentment and revenge and discovery of Magnum PI skills monitoring him for the rest of your marital relationship? Hurt and resentment floods the mind – the song “shot to through the heart and your to blame, baby you give love a bad name” ringing in your ears!

Once a cheater always a cheater – a leopard never changes its spots! The risk of sharing STD’s – social standing tainted – could the guests and family forgive this premarital infidelity …. Could we mend the marital bonds even before it commenced – Trust broken!

So he demands your forgiveness, and you agree to work at the relationship although you have been tainted in society …

If you are in the unconditional love mode and willing to forgive then you will carry on with the relationship – should you go to therapy and work at it and trust that you will not judge this person for the rest of their journey together. But in society today we are people with emotions and emotions may lend a hand to us not being able to forgive, the thought will always be in the back of our mind. But if we really love that person we forgive and forget … Do you really get past this feeling of hurt?

In the end I don’t think I can forgive – I will always have the thought burning in the back of my mind. Where have you been, with whom – I end up monitoring his every move. Probably in a future drunken stupor bring up the topic and the best will be to end the relationship and not to put this person through a lifelong misery of being under the microscope – where in turn I decided not to forgive – it’s just that he broke the trust and living with the thought would be more damaging – so I let him go – we part our own ways ….. I have fallen out of love with him …


“If someone cheats on you they do not love you, remember that. If someone cheats on you they do not care about you as much as they say they do. If someone cheats on you it means that for a split second you were off their mind long enough for them to put another person in arms that should only be for you. If someone cheats on you, dear god, I hope you don’t go back to them because you are worth so much more than that. – Unknown


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