Is your kid the bully in the school yard? How to deal with the situation.

Bullying, my child? Say What? You cannot be serious. I have raised my child to be a model citizen and he would not even kill a fly!

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Whether we choose to deal with this harsh reality of our child bulling others, we will find at times that we are totally oblivious to the fact. It could be that you argue insistently with your ex-husband or your children are exposed to abusive indirect moments in a healthy marital relationship. Or your child’s class mates or friends influence him/her in adversely, whereby your child will bully in order to get ahead in life, have a dictatorship manner in the order he/she deems fit is appropriate in society.

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Children do emulate people, circumstances and in general what is around them whether negative or positive … they are growing up and they have to decide what is right or wrong.   They will take on tendencies of either physical, verbal, emotional and cyber bullying.

Your child will initially display insecurity, picking on children by teasing, beating or ganging up in groups, displaying moods of aggression towards other children.

Author William E. Copeland, PhD, a professor in the Department of Psychiatry and Behavioural Sciences at Duke University, stated that “We were surprised at how profoundly bullying affects a person’s long-term functioning,” said “This psychological damage doesn’t just go away because a person grew up and is no longer bullied. This is something that stays with them. If we can address this now, we can prevent a whole host of problems down the road.”

In the 21st Century children are emancipated to a certain extent, you cannot physical beat them to reprimand them however you need to psychological get to the route of the problem which is a slow process in order to rear them.

Parenting today involves identify the causes of children’s abusive nature. Speaking openly, preferably with a guidance counsellor/teacher/life coach to identify their needs, get to the crux of what they are going through. Mostly when children feel victimised in some way or other they act out – counselling is an option to enable you to up your parenting skills, as well as being counselled yourself. Initially it will be hard work … you need to act in accordance of your children’s best interests.

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Communication is key make it known that this type of behaviour is unacceptable and teach children right from wrong. In turn take a vested interest and effort to educate yourself and your child on how to deal with the negative and positive influences they may be exposed to in life. Generally experts on the subject, whether teachers or psychologist or mainly parents need to educate themselves on the topic due to the rise in children’s social standing as these lessons will either impact negatively or positively in the adult years. Prevention is better than cure so we start now – gearing towards positive development. Or get some educational reading – http://www.safeschools.info/content/BPToolkit2013.pdf

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