Did he lose that loving feeling by choice, did we both move too fast …. The magic disappeared, lost, long gone, butterfly feeling faded, moon shine and roses seem like a vague fantasy. Did the mutual fixation have a very early expiry date?
HE IS JUST NOT IN TO YOU!!!!!!
So is this the end, oh well you decided to totally ignore the tell tail signals of your boyfriends obvious patterns of disinterest yet you latched onto him like kryptonite repelling his most inner core. What went wrong? Was it something you said or did not do? How did things take a turn for this worst? Were you so blinded by desire or was this relationship doomed from the start.
You both did what you did. The awkward awakening of the trust burns deep. He distances himself from you. You keep calling or texting him. There are always excuses when you wish to meet with him. Excuses are inevitable, listing family emergencies, weather conditions, work commitments, health issues and the list is endless. Eventually when he makes time for you, he is cold and distant, more attention is focused on his physical needs and he lacks communicating – no more endearments to offer. The utter shock and realisation that you were not compatible to start off with kicks you back into reality!
Did you gain a few kilograms along the way and steered away from the supermodel look and leaned over to a Jerry Springer candidate? Are you too emotional? Did you cling onto him acting out your instability to live without him and need his constant attention?
Oh yes, you were clingy, needy and a down-right prima donna. You knew that it was a world wind romance but yet pursued the passion and dreamy Mills and Boon theme. Wham Bam thank you Mam!
Relationships are based on friendship, trust, and mutual understanding. We feel so much physical emotion when we meet someone new that feelings cloud our entire emotional status. We lose sight of the hard work involved and that we should take time to get to know the other person whether they are compatible and whether we can share a long term relationship and move forward.
We expect people to suddenly fall in line to what we perceive them / the relationship to be. In any event his cowardly stance in letting you off the hook by not facing the music and confront you head on and break it off. Instead you were faced with break up messages either by way of text, Facebook or email. He just didn’t have the guts and was totally shameless!
You know in the back of your mind all signs were there but you chose to ignore your gut feeling because you felt needy, wanted and lost sight of the building blocks of a good meaningful relationship. Once blinded and dissed the realisation and initial unexpected voice of reason kicked in and you heeded to your inner voice. He lost interest, it takes two to tango and yeah …. Next please! You may move on, but have learnt in the process.
“Nothing is perfect. Life is messy. Relationships are complex. Outcomes are uncertain. People are irrational.” Hugh Mackay