40+ Woman…when to embrace the “cougar” label

The definition of a Cougar Woman according to Wikipedia is “a slang term that refers to a woman who seeks sexual relations with considerably younger men.” Now if you want to take on that label and its predatory connotations then go for it but I think it is very demeaning to a woman.


Not only that but what kind of men will she attract? Not a man of substance that is for sure. Men who will see her as a play thing or something to be conquered! If you think you are picking your prey, you are mistaken; the irony here is that you end up being the prey.

Older women find it almost empowering to date younger men and be sexually confident and I am not disputing that but the term “Cougar” just has so many negative intimations. It also suggests that you are just trying to hard or trying to prove something. Sometimes it is all in the spirit of fun and it’s ok to play around but just don’t unpack your bags and live in that place. You can still be 40, sexy, single and have fun without appearing desperate! Many women even say their lives only begin at 40. With programs like Cougar Town and celebrities like Demi Moore, Cameron Diaz and Even Madonna flaunting their forties and giving courage for many women to do the same, just make sure you have got it to flaunt. There is nothing worse than mutton dressed up as lamb.


Some signs of a Cougar are too much make up, tight fitting clothes, skirts that are far too short and push-up bras. Sometimes they are also sugar mama’s, who are recently divorced, very well dressed and ready to use their credit cards. Cougars come in packs; they usually have a group of other ‘Cougars’ with them to hunt down their men. They are also usually very forward and will lure their toy boys. Younger men usually like the appeal of an older .experienced woman. They are pulled in because they think it can just be a one night stand or short term fling with no commitments. Men should beware of the Cougar who is menopausal, she can be friendly and sweet one minute and then completely psycho the next.


The only time to embrace the Cougar label is if you lack all self respect and if you are ok with dating boys with mommy issues or boys who want a notch on their belt. Just be you! You do not need a label to tell you, you are beautiful. Don’t waste your precious life chasing after the wrong things. Live your life to the full, you do not need permission to have a blast or to find true love. In seeking true love, age is just a number and when two souls find each other and connect, nothing else really matters.

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